In order to appeal to the always important male 18-35 demographic, TLC is considering finding a timeslot for Jon and some of his newest friends.

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Shouldn’t Jon get his time to shine?  Does the sound of Kate bitching make you want to grab a shotgun?  Isn’t it time to focus on a different 8?  Leave a comment.

Everybody and their mother seems to be writing a book.  Diesel from Mattress Police has a new book.  The Caucasians over at Stuff White People Like have a book.  And tons of other bloggers, affiliate marketers and pimps all have published books on one subject or another.  The other day, someone asked me when I was going to write a book, so I thought long and hard and decided what I was gonna write: a coloring book for adults.

Everybody enjoys colouring books.   However, most colouring books are aimed at a much younger audience.  There really aren’t a lot of colouring books designed for adults to enjoy. This is no longer the case. In celebration of Halloween, I have put together a special e-book: “Costume Ideas: A Halloween Colouring Book For Adults”. And the best part - ITS FREE.

So, if you like sexy girls and you like colouring, DOWNLOAD IT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So to all you pimps who think you are so good because you are a published author, hwo’d you like me now?

Oh, and BTW, for those Americans who think I have a ton of typos on this page, the rest of the world spells it colour, not color.

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Can you tell  the difference between a budding young actress and someone who should be collecting social security, based solely on their boobs?  If you think you can, give Over or Under 60 a try.

Good luck.

But the outspoken rapper/producer found himself on stage spouting the virtues of Beyoncé Knowles, once again.  What Mr. West  had neglected to consider when he jumped on stage at a small theatre in East Los Angeles, was that he was interupting an acceptabce speech at the Transexual Adult Films Awards (also knowns as the Shemmys).

When award winner Leslie Coxx pointed out that perhaps Kanye may have been mistaken.  The controversial rapper stood his ground insisting that Beyoncé Knowles be recognized for her talent.  Ms.  Coxx proceeded to explain that she had been awarded the Shemmy for “Best Group Sex Performance by a She-male Involving Midgets“, Kanye wouldn’t budge. Ms. Coxx questioned Mr. West about whether or not  Ms. Knowles had ever performed fellatio on 72 midgets in the course of an hour.  The outspoken rapper responded: “If by 72 midgets, you mean Jay Z, then the answer would be yes.” When Ms. Coxx pointed out that in order to qualify for the award, Beyoncé would need to have a penis, Mr. West responded by saying “If  by penis, you mean Jay Z, then the answer would be yes.”

Visibly frustrated by this interruption, Ms. Coxx lifted up her dress to reveal her rather large endowment.  After a few seconds of shock, Kanye apologized and left the stage.

At the time of this report, Kanye was expected to be appearing at this weekend’s Emmy Awards in hopes of winning an award for his recent appearance on the Jay Leno Show.

What exactly are we sending our kids back to?

You’ve got five racks to pick from, so see if you can tell the difference.

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If humankind was judged solely based on the behavior of these notable celebrities, we’d be in deep trouble.   If you don’t believe me, then take a look at the five examples below through an extra-terrestrials eyes.

1. Humans Are Shape-Shifters.

While the idea sounds like something out of a Star Trek episode, the idea of changing one’s form is all part of showbiz.  Hollywood’s love affair with plastic surgery is always a hot topic. whether its Tori Spelling’s nose,  Donatella Versace’s lips, or Michael Jackson’s…what would you call it….genetic remix. Take a look at the gloved one 30 years ago, and then again before his recent death, and tell me he hasn’t shifted a few shapes.

2. Earth Lost Its Gravity

Thanks in part to the extraordinary amount of celebrity boobjobs, top heavy celebrities make it appear as if there is no force pulling their massive mammaries down.  Stick Pamela Anderson on the moon, and see if there is any difference.  No noticeable difference.

3. All Breeding Must Be Documented

The wave of celebrity sex tapes that has seen the light of day is reaching epidemic proportions.  Paris Hilton is reportedly now starring in her third, while numerous other members of Hollywood’s finest have been recording and leaking their most intimate moments.  Some have been intriguing (Pamela Anderson, Kim Kardashian) and others more on the disturbing side (Verne “Mini Me” Troyer”). If you were to turn on the television and hear about the release of another sex tape, wouldn’t you start to wonder?

4 Humans are self destructive

Which celebrity is currently in rehab for alcohol/drug/sex addiction?  Which have had encountered problems with an eating disorder?  Which had contemplated suicide?  The list is a who’s-who of famous train wrecks.  Whether you last name is Biden, Lohan, Lowe, Osbourne or Richie, the media has been there the document the dirty dteails.  Don’t even get me started on Amy Winehouse.

5. Earth Has Already Been Infiltrated By Alien Lifeforms

Yes.  Aliens from another planet have already infiltrated Hollywood, and the good people of Earth are too stupid to notice.  I’m not talking about John Travolta or Tom Cruise (who have been trying to tell the public this for years).  But if you take a close eye out there sometime, you may realize that some of those movie stars are not quite human.

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Any other observations and alien might make?  Should we all start recording our mating rituals with Paris Hilton?  Does Lyle Lovett know that we know?  Leave a comment.

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Is there someone else who may need to be outed?  Any other actors who could transition to porn without too much problem?  Does Zac Efron look pleased with what he sees?  Leave a comment.

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