Posts Tagged ‘pervert’
The Seven Most Perverse Superpowers
Like most kids, I was always amazed by the cool superpowers that my favorite comic book heroes had. I often imagined it would be cool to be able to fly or have super strength. As I grew older and saw many of my favorite superheroes and supervillians find their way onto the big screen, it also occurred to me that many of those real neat powers could be used in some very naughty ways. Here is the list of the seven most perverse of those powers.
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An Open Letter To Google Users
Dear Google User,
You have probably come across this site, because you are a socially awkward and emotionally unstable pervert. Now, please don’t take offense, as many of my closest friends fall under this category. How do I know this about you? Let’s just say when I go through my log files, I see some very strange entries.
When you searched for “women as meat“, you found women and meat, but you didn’t find any women being mistaken for food (you must have some weird cannibal fantasy).
When you searched for “nice funbags” and “sweater stretchers”, you found that we enhanced the former Destiny Child member’s milk factories, however you didn’t find anything obscenely graphic (as much as you hoped you would).
When you searched for “lindsay lohan sex tape” but instead found a satirical look at celebrity sex tapes, I actually felt kinda bad. But when I saw you searched for “emmanuel lewis sex tape”, I threw-up in my mouth a little.
When you searched for “how dogs mate”, I felt like contacting the authorities about your disgusting animal fetish (but I didn’t).
And finally when you searched for “funny whores”, you got a glimpse at a couple posts about Eliot Spitzer’s extra-marital activities. And what happens to me? I’m left in wonderment about the possibility of some female stand-up comic who had to take on the oldest known profession to pay the bills. Maybe you should try doing a search on “Sarah Silverman”.
Anyway, I look forward to your next misguided search, and hope you enjoy your stay, you retarded degenerate.
